At the Beach with Judy

no men here, just Judy...that's all a girl needs when she wants to loll around the beach half naked with no mind to take care of a Number. a girl and her dog can have a mighty fine time down on the coast of real Florida. i like paying homage to St. Teresa as often as possible. seeing how she changes with the seasons, what birds from afar are visiting, watching the fiddler crabs as they scuttle ahead of me when pass them on the board walk, what detritus has swept up with the tides. and walking vigorously through the water working, working my legs until they hurt. now, don't get me wrong 'cause being half naked with a Number is glorious but i don't like always like having to tend to another's needs like i used to. i reckon if i put my mind to it i can summon up one of the Men by Numbers for a little activity by just by willing it....

god i love being almost a half century old and almost in control of my own mind!

Men By Numbers

they're out there waiting to do your bidding, these Men by Numbers. without an expectation or an obligation these men are fun and easy and capable of anything. and i love them all. i sometimes list them just for fun. the one that's always there to sweep you off to the show or for a meal. that one who will show up for an odd repair but knows there'll be some food in the deal, another just likes the gossip. then there are the shy ones that like to tag along for a spur of the moment jaunt to some unknown destination for the thrill of it. what about sex, you ask? ahhh...that's the special category that doesn't diminish the others but puts them into a sub-class of their own...the body never forgets so years may pass but a thought, a photo, a word from the past can re-light the fire of memory. sad, though, because the long distance Numbers fear always that they've dropped in rank because they're far, far away. not true. my heart holds them all at Number One..... but being in close proximity does help!

On Everything and Nothing

i want to say everything and then nothing because it sometimes seems to be such bullshit, you know? a fight with a loved one that pulls at your heart and is forgotten in a a week but leaves the tiniest scar. a fabulous lover that just doesn't cut it in so many other areas of one's life that you just become bloody bored with the trivial pursuit of something else to do besides tangle and dance. how about the kid that sprung from your own loins that has become an alien and even though you expected it that once they turned the page into teen hood and got bulked and hulked and turned themselves inside out like some creature from star wars? ah well, it all passes, it really does and then you go to a yoga class that kicks your ass and makes you cry and laugh and want to spank the yoga teacher...that's when it's not just bullshit...