Men By Numbers

they're out there waiting to do your bidding, these Men by Numbers. without an expectation or an obligation these men are fun and easy and capable of anything. and i love them all. i sometimes list them just for fun. the one that's always there to sweep you off to the show or for a meal. that one who will show up for an odd repair but knows there'll be some food in the deal, another just likes the gossip. then there are the shy ones that like to tag along for a spur of the moment jaunt to some unknown destination for the thrill of it. what about sex, you ask? ahhh...that's the special category that doesn't diminish the others but puts them into a sub-class of their own...the body never forgets so years may pass but a thought, a photo, a word from the past can re-light the fire of memory. sad, though, because the long distance Numbers fear always that they've dropped in rank because they're far, far away. not true. my heart holds them all at Number One..... but being in close proximity does help!

On Everything and Nothing

i want to say everything and then nothing because it sometimes seems to be such bullshit, you know? a fight with a loved one that pulls at your heart and is forgotten in a a week but leaves the tiniest scar. a fabulous lover that just doesn't cut it in so many other areas of one's life that you just become bloody bored with the trivial pursuit of something else to do besides tangle and dance. how about the kid that sprung from your own loins that has become an alien and even though you expected it that once they turned the page into teen hood and got bulked and hulked and turned themselves inside out like some creature from star wars? ah well, it all passes, it really does and then you go to a yoga class that kicks your ass and makes you cry and laugh and want to spank the yoga teacher...that's when it's not just bullshit...

They Do Grow Up Fast Don't They?

i was looking through a group of photos that my friend Mika took years ago on Mashes Sands, down by the Ochlocknee Bay, and i always become mesmerized by the ones that included the Boy. i remember that try as we might we could not persuade him to stay out of the frame while shooting. we finally just said 'what the hell?' and let him do what he wanted.... Mika had a running series of nudes in the Florida landscape and this shoot started an artist/model relationship that went on for several years and involved several locations: Mashes Sands, Lloyd Creek were two we liked to use.

after we saw the proofs we were amazed at how much the Boy's presence added to the depth of the context of the scene, sometimes presenting a visual non-sequitar if that makes sense...he moved in and out of the frames with ease and seemed always to be in the right place when Mika took the shot. after all the sessions we did i still find this series the most surreal and magical. this photo is one of my favorites and i am going to drag out a few more to muse upon...

my butt doesn't look too bad either...

Before Men by Numbers

this is an aside before the Men by Numbers piece that i'm working on....

i love, really love that i can return home after working through my very busy DailyDance Card and get into bed with the Collection of stuff that i've brought to bed with me over, let's say 3 days, and know that i don't have to move a damn thing to accomodate any body! it' delicious....

in bed with me right now is a motley but related collection: DVD's from the library ('Mrs. Dalloway', 'Breakfast on Pluto'), old tissues, lots of random pillows- each with a specific purpose (i like perfection in comfort), books ( cookbook, How to Build Garden Pools, novel that i'm not into right now, 'Howard's End', which i am into. 'Savage Beauty', the bio of Edna St. Vinny Millay', a repeat read for me), and several pajamas bottoms stuffed at the foot of my bed that i don't have to move because:

I Don't Have To Accomodate Anyone But Me. (hahahahahhaahahha!!)